Before and During

Some people look at me and think I have it easy. That I have good genetics and can get into shape fast. You know those types that can eat anything they want and not gain anything. Who can run a marathon at a 6:30 pace without even training. I'm jealous of those types. I just look at food and gain 5 pounds. I have to bust my butt day in and day out to see results or to hit my goals. So when people tell me that I am blessed because I can lose weight or get into shape fast, I just want to smack them.

After my last marathon in February, I stopped running. I hated running. I wanted nothing to do with it. Actually, those feelings started back in December. And since December, I ate my emotions. So many things played in

to my depression. It was an extremely hard time for me and until a few weeks ago I didn't realize how bad it was. If you've gone through depression, you know what I'm taking about. So anyway, with being depressed and eating my emotions, I put on weight. Go figure haha A month ago, my family was getting ready to go to the water park and I felt "fat" in my swim bottoms. I took a shot of my behind and sure enough, eww. (Jimmy Fallon anyone??)  It was gross. So I covered up and beat myself up about it. (Because that makes it all better, right?) Well, after all the craziness with dropping out of my bike race and getting into my favorite marathon, it was game on for me. This is the year that I will be consistent and get closer to my goal of qualifying for Boston.

The last 3 week's I have busting my butt, literally, every day. I have a ton of work do and there's no time to waste. I mentioned in my last post about not letting the scale define me. It's been really hard to step on the scale and see no change. Even when I felt thinner, nothing changed.

Remember that picture of my rear end I took a few weeks ago? Well I decided to take another picture to compare. Let me first just tell you that I am a firm believer of taking photos. They show progress that the scale doesn't. After feeling bad because the scale wasn't going down, I compared the photos side by side and I cannot tell you how excited I was. Sometimes it's hard to see progress when you're stuck on a number you want the scale to read, but I challenge anyone reading this to take a photo now and then in a month's time, take another. That's how I will track my progress from now on.

Ok...now the scary part. I'm posting a photo of my rear end in my swim suit. It's no where near perfect, when comparing to this bikini models, but it's progress for me. (Be nice, don't say anything negative about this post. I really am proud of myself and don't need a Debbie downer to criticize me.) (Can you tell I'm a little insecure about posting this? But I like to document for the future. I like looking back and seeing where I started.) (Oh and ignore my messy mirrors. I hate cleaning them haha)